As a very short slasher film, Aquaslash fails for the most part. With very little plot and even less in the way of slasher antics, it just floats along the lazy river of itself until the credits roll. All is not lost though as the movie moonlights as a high school coming of age party movie. In fact, there are more moments in this film that would fit into a late-night comedy than they would a slasher.
If it wasn't for the razorblade blood slides of the last ten minutes Aquaslash would probably have been filed into my series, The Five Bees, which is a mini-study of sex comedies. This movie features an unending parade of Boobs, Butts, Bikinis, and Boners. As for the Balderdash, well, the story is about high school graduates who have a school supported weekend-long party at a water park, with barely any supervision. This just screams sex comedy. The whole thing fits perfectly into the five bees lifestyle. The kids are more interested in sex, drugs, and more sex. The people running the water park are also interested in sex, some of the time with high school students, which is a bit odd after the movie makes a big deal about consent and respect and then has multiple storylines of adults sleeping with high school kids. There is a live band playing '80s tunes that features a lead singer who gets bullied a lot for his band sucking. This is the kind of bullying you hate to see, and it makes you mad until you hear their mind-wrenchingly awful version of Sunglasses at night, and you find yourself agreeing with the bully.
I am still having issues calling this a slasher though. There are two very quick deaths at the beginning of the film as two teens, who are sexing it up, get hacked to death. It's quick and gruesome, and you figure that this film is off to a promising start. Especially with a paltry seventy-one-minute runtime, you couldn't be blamed for thinking the movie is all about the killing of horny teens. That is the slasher's Modus Operandi anyway. Then, a sex comedy/drama happens for the next hour or so, leaving a ten-minute finale where the killer lays a trap in the water slides and watches the kids kill themselves due to stupidity. Weirdly, it's kind of realistic in its portrayal of non-thinking teens, but also dull beyond belief. It feels more like a revenge movie by the end, and very little like a killer slasher movie.
If you don't mind a very short spurt of murder in your late-night naked sex comedies, then Aquaslash will most like fill a void for you. If you want a classic style slasher film, then this one doesn't fit that bill. Still, it is kind of fun, and short enough to forgive some faults, but it feels like a missed opportunity more than anything.